Is choosing your life possible?

How can you choose your life? It’s not as hard as you might think. Let’s start with the art of choosing and then get to work.

Choosing is an art.

As such, it’s not a science, per se. There are certainly technical elements, which we will get into. But the overarching theme of choosing well is that it is an art. And as such, it takes time in, learning the craft.

If you will put in the time, you will find that you can choose your life rather easily — and live the life you want.

Here’s the problem.

You’re not putting in the time. Oh, sure. You’re busy. But with what? If you’re not familiar with the Eisenhower chart, take a peek at that here. It basically outlines the four quadrants that account for where you spend your time.

If you want to create the life you want, you will want to spend much more time in Q2, where you focus on long-term goals and relationships. Why? Because you will want to begin with yourself and where you put your energy.

Did you notice the choice?

If you’re still with me, you will have noticed that I am suggesting a basic choice at the front end: choose to focus on yourself first. Many men miss this foundational choice. There are many reasons for this: perhaps you grew up under the thumb of a narcissistic parent. Or maybe you are in a relationship now with someone who is extremely selfish, and you don’t want to be that person.

But you can focus on yourself without being a narcissist or an asshole. I can show you how.

Start here.

Please listen to this short talk (about 18 minutes long) about the art of choosing, by Sheena Iyengar, then come right back for today’s takeaway.

The takeaway:

To learn the art of choosing, start with yourself. It’s not easy to look at your own life. But if you will, you can learn to choose well in all the other arenas.

Read more.

I can help you chose well — beginning with yourself.