One of the reasons you’re anxious is because you’re too optimistic. Because optimists are often disappointed. Whereas realists know that facing your problems head on — without losing hope — wins the day.

Life is scary.

Right? I mean, unless you’re totally checked out, you may have noticed that there are lots of demands on you. So if you want to succeed, you’ve got to step up your game. But that’s scary, because it seems like you’re already doing just about everything you can think of to make it. And yes — some of those demands come from outside of you — from your partners in crime to your love partner. But many of those demands also come from inside of you. Because you have big dreams. But you’re not sure how to get from A to B, much less get through the day. So — is being optimistic the way to go?

Being optimistic sometimes helps.

Sometimes in the midst of the stress, you turn to your old friend, Optimism. And here’s what Optimism says. It says, “Hey — it’s OK. You didn’t do so well today, but tomorrow is bound to be better.” And I’ll be the first one to admit that sometimes you need that pep talk from good old Optimism.

But being realistic is better.

Because as good as wishful thinking can be, being realistic is better. Why? Because realism will sustain you longer and take you further than a premature pat on the back. And that’s exactly the point. Optimism gets you by — but realism gets you going.

Let’s get real.

So — please do this. Treat yourself to a short (less than 20 minutes) TED talk about how to get where you’re going. And then make a plan to face your challenges in a new way. And if you’d like help with that, feel free to get in touch with me at mark@marknewtonpdx.com. As a men’s life coach, I work with creative men every day to help you get focused and get moving.